Belajar Bijaksana Melihat Perbuatan Anak-anak
Mendidik anak bukanlah perkara yang mudah. Meskipun saya belum punya anak, namun saya selalu belajar dari para orang tua tentang pengalaman mereka mendidik anak. Judul diatas adalah satu yang saya dapatkan hari ini.
Semua anak adalah baik
Pada dasarnya semua anak-anak itu baik. Itulah yang saya percayai hingga hari ini. Tidak ada satupun anak-anak di dunia ini yang memiliki niat untuk mencelakakan orang lain. Orang tua dan lingkungan lah yang mengajarkan hal itu. Kecenderungan anak-anak pada dasarnya adalah berbuat baik, namun bisa berubah jika orang tua dan lingkungannya tidak menunjukkan contoh yang baik.
Sebagai contoh, seorang anak itu pada dasarnya adalah dermawan, cobalah kepada anak-anak yang belum “terkontaminasi”. Namun ketika si orang tua tidak menunjukkan sifat kedermawanan di depan anaknya, maka itu akan berpengaruh pada anaknya. Saat melihat orang tua dan lingkungannya “pelit” atau “kurang dermawan” mereka akan menirunya karena menganggap itulah tindakan yang benar.
Menghargai niat anak-anak
Setiap perbuatan manusia, baik anak-anak maupun orang dewasa pasti didasari pada suatu niat. Untuk anak-anak, saya bisa pastikan niatnya baik. Namun terkadang kemampuan motorik dan logikanya dalam melakukan sesuatu belum berkembang sempurna sehingga niatan yang baik itu terkadang berubah wujud menjadi hal yang menurut kita tidak baik, bahkan menimbulkan masalah.
Suatu pagi teman saya dikagetkan dengan suara barang pecah belah dari arah dapur. Saat ia bangun dari tempat tidur dan memeriksa dapur, ia menemukan anak lelakinya yang baru berusia 5 tahun sedang berada diantara pecahan piring dan gelas. Ada sekitar 3 piring dan 1 gelas yang pecah. Ia hanya berkata kepada putranya untuk tidak bergerak lalu membersihkan pecahan-pecahan tersebut. Setelah itu baru dia menghampiri putranya dan menanyakan apa yang terjadi.
Ternyata putranya itu pagi-pagi sudah bangun, mencoba membangunkan ayah ibunya. Keduanya tidak bangun, sehingga sang anak berasumsi mereka capek. Kemudian timbul pemikiran, “hey! kenapa tidak aku saja yang bikin sarapan? ayah ibu kan capek, biar aku saja, mereka tinggal makan.” Nah, niatnya baik, kan? Terbukti memang sudah ada 4 roti tawar di toaster. Itu membuktikan bahwa putranya tidak berbohong.
Lalu apa yang dilakukan oleh teman saya? Memarahi putranya tersebut? TIDAK SAMA SEKALI.
Ia tidak memvonis sebelum mencari tahu, itulah kenapa ia tidak langsung marah-marah ketika tahu ada gelas dan piring pecah. Setelah tahu apa yang terjadi, ia sangat menghargai niat yang baik dari putranya. Justru ia mengajarkan bagaimana cara melakukan hal itu tanpa memecahkan piring dan gelas. Bahkan besoknya ia membelikan piring dan gelas anti-pecah khusus untuk anaknya supaya putranya tidak menghabiskan piring dan gelas keramik. 😀
Dia berpesan pada saya: JANGAN HENTIKAN NIATNYA, TAPI PERBAIKI CARA MEREKA MEWUJUDKANNYA.
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